My heart still breaks.

After spending so much time reading others thoughts on Earl, I still can't help but feel my heart break.

I'll be the first to admit that there were many others who were closer to him than I was, but when you befriend a legend who doesn't act like one, how do you know how to let it go? How do you let go of not only someone you admired and looked up to, but someone you called a friend?

It's finally hitting me today that he really is gone. I've been looking at getting flights out to Minnesota for the wake/ funeral, but again, my fiances won't allow it and I'm damn near in tears. The one last chance I have to say goodbye and I can't. I know that next time I'm in Minnesota, I'll have to stop by a few of his old haunting grounds to pay my respects to him.

It's amazing that one person touched the lives of so many people. Every single word I read about him has been nothing but positive words, "Legend. Hero, Metal God, Brother, Friend, Inspiration, Mentor" but the one that I've read in almost every single message is "I love you." I tried to keep track, but lost count. He never acted as if he was better than anyone, it was his humility that kept his so human.

Everyone knows Earl's in the after life raising some hell.

It's going to be really hard for me to see anyone associated with Earl and when I go back to Minnesota, the tears will start all over again. I only cry because I miss him, even in his sickness he still stayed in touch with me when he could... and I did my best to send him text messages telling him I loved him and missed him.

It's hard to lose someone who touched every single person he came in contact with. I knew Earl was a great person, but the more I read, the more I realize just how truly amazing he was. Almost every show I went to, he was there with a huge smile and a hug. When ever he was out, he always had a brave front and never showed how much pain he was in.

That's the only solace I have is knowing that he's not in pain anymore, and I cry because I'll miss him I know we all will.

If everyone even tried to be 1/100th the man that Earl was, this life would be so much easier. Even that is large shoes to fill.

Dammit, why did he have to go? The world shouldn't have to suffer the loss of such an incredible person...

We miss you Earl, I miss you. Be safe and rest if you have to. We promise we won't forget you, there's no way anyone could. Ever.

-MetalRose