Psychotic

Alright, here is the story.

A friend of mine (who will remain nameless) dated and lived with their significant other for a period of quite a few years. They broke up many years ago and kept in contact for a short while.

My friend hasn't talked to their ex in over a year. Today this person told me they were going to drive by their ex's new house "just to see where it was and what it looked like." I told this person not to do it because it would be considered stalking.

I then prodded and asked how this person knew of the new place. They admitted they googled their ex and found the address of the ex's new place. I asked why they googled their ex and my friend replied that they googled a lot of people. I asked if they had googled me. They said they hadn't.

I asked if they had been invited to the house, and they said no. I kept trying to ask why this person wanted to drive by the ex's and I couldn't get a good answer, all this person did was try and justify going over there. It went from: I want to see where they live, it's a competition, and I want to see how they are doing or I want to see how our old pet is.

I pointed out if they wanted to see how their ex was doing all they had to do was to email or call the person and that driving by their house (when they had NO other reason to be in that area) would be considered stalking. They said they weren't so I printed out a list of signs of stalking and highlighted what they were doing.

When I pointed them out they said they weren't doing that. Cyberstalking- they said they weren't constantally IMing them or sending them emails. I did point out that it has been a vast number of years since they broke up and yet this person is STILL googling their ex to check up on them.

Surveillance- They said they weren't but then said they were going by the house to "check up on them" which I pointed out is exactally that.

The printed page then said something about it being a pattern. The person claimed they hadn't done it before. Which may be true, but I'm sure this is not the first time they googled their ex.

They then asked if I had ever googled anyone and I told them yes. BUT the reasons I google people are FAR different from the reason this person is. I google my son's dad to see if I can locate him. I've also googled D after he admitted googling me. I've googled myself a bunch of times as well.

So my question to everyone: Should this person drive by their ex's place "to check up on him, see how he's doing, and to see if they can spot an animal in the window"? Keep in mind this relationship has been done for many years and there has been no contact between the two parties in at least a year.

There was at least 3 other people who said that what this person is doing isn't sane... and one said, "Let 'em do it if they want."

Your thoughts? Is it borderline stalking or is just an old flame making sure everything is alright?

-MetalRose